My head starts to feel dizzy like a whirlpool,  the ones where as a kid you and all your friends would walk or try to run around the outer sides creating this hurricane of dreams in the middle and then stopping and letting yourselves float with the current. When it starts to feel like this I get nervous and scared that it's coming back. That feeling where nothing matters anymore and your worthless and your life is one big fuck up and a waste of time. I know it's not, I know that I got a handle on this for once, that I can finally deem myself as having some kind of fucking potential. And it only took what? Twenty odd years to get here.