I guess it's because there's a moon out tonight

White bath robe meets me in the night
the butterflies in my stomach drown
in the cranberry juice and vodka.
it's been a year, perhaps, and
I always waited for another elevator
or a river bank
but they never showed their faces.
I never wanted to admit to myself
that I needed you, that I wanted you,
that you
actually
meant something.
But here I am
tonight -
I slip out of your window like a kid
up to no good, sneaking
to smoke cigarettes, blowing
smoke signals into the night sky
S.O.S LOVE IS IN THE AIR
... .. . .. ... .. . . . . ....
save me before I drown.

and ya don't stop

Sitting on my couch
bumpin' some Jedi Mind Tricks
trying to jedi mind trick you into fallin' inlove
with me.

rock n' roll

He delivers the mail to
people who don't know
his name.
in a big building downtown-
He's saying to hell with it,
I'm old and what do I have to lose?
he's moving to the philipines
to see his children
that he had when he played in
a band in the 60's-
a rock n' roll band-
where he went to bed with
tons of girls
so he's moving to go see
his children whose names
HE can barely remember
in hope that he can make up for
all of the mail
he never delivered to them.

Open The Car Door So We Can See (for Bethany Jo)

we sat in your friends car
you got high as I took shots of whiskey
the countdown was led by drunken boys
we couldnt see their faces
but could hear them correct each other
on the numbers
"10, 9, 8- no wait!",
"6, 5, you fucked it up-"
they yelled at each other
I dont even think we cared
that it was a new year
because we missed the
countdown and kissed each other at
12:10 am
 instead of men
and as our lips met,
I forgave you for
sleeping with him
and you forgave me for
caring.

Is This Real Life Anymore?

dreaming of magic love when I can one day spend my time laying in fields full of flowers in the mountains with hills all around me reading my books and daydreaming of beautiful men who write.
The words trail out of their fingers like the slime of snails. ...............

Slowly carefully beautifully.
Leaving the past behind and finding that life gives you always bigger and better things.
Wanting to apologize and thank at the same time all the men and boys who I have left broken heartedly, selfishly, to figure things out for myself knowing full and well that I didnt need them, that they were there to make my time pass more quickly.
Understanding that once you find that person that makes you dizzy with magic, that your world gets more colorful, the lines blur, and you feel that romantic freedom. encouragement is love.

swahili love poetry

 The cold weather moves in and out of my body-
slides in my mouth, in between my legs and around my breast.
He only stays for a couple months then leaves me for someone new.
All throughout the summer I miss him fervently. I imagine his coldness wrapping itself around my body which gives me goose bumps. When he returns, im no longer worried about smoking my cigarettes inside my room- I crave the crispness of his company on my porch and he always makes my nipples hard as rocks letting the older men catch a glimpse of things they cannot have. I always wear my best coats around him. The cold weather and I.

April

Time ticks away on the clock in my kitchen and as I lay in bed writing on my yellow paper about masturbating I realize what I want more and more. I'll gather all my writings and i'll have a book done by april, someone will pay for it to be printed as a present and I will give them to the people that I hate the most. I write about everyone in the most beautiful poetic words known to man to spite you. All of my lovers have been recorded in history and have their own pages. Someone has been invading and astral projecting themselves in my dreams and whispering things in my ear. I know who you are and I would like it if you would be more creative and make it snow in my dreams or take me to italy. I'd like that a lot. My insides are twisting as blood rains out of my sex and im reminded that I could always bear children. The cherries that I bought at the store the other day are blacker than black and leave my lips stained like the blood. Do your tarot cards often and daydream mostly. You live in my world not the other way around, honey.